Dear
Dad,
It’s been a
long time since I’ve sat down to write a letter, especially to you. I think the
last time I can remember writing was when I was at summer camp, and we wrote on
birch bark !
I think we
go through life in a way in which we just figure that we know how life is going. But do I really know what you have done in your life? Or do you really know what I have done in my life? I think this is especially true of our
children. I think I know what my two boys are doing in their lives and I figure
they know what I am doing… but may be that isn’t so. Maybe we need to stop from time to time and
see how things are going in each other’s life. I thought I would sit down and
write…
I know you
are getting older and I know you are facing some new challenges as you go. As I was growing up, you were always there,
going to work in the morning, coming home after work, working on the car or
mowing the lawn – what ever seemed to be needing done at the time. Helping a
neighbor with a problem or going to someone’s house to help them with something
there. This is a trait that I have learned well, and it was a skill, that
perhaps, you didn’t even know you were teaching me… to help others.
You would
come home from work and we would go to McDonalds for dinner. One night, the
woman behind the counter asked if we were going to have the usual…??? The next night, you stopped at the market and
came home with a steak ! Neither one of
us had any idea how to cook it, so it went in a fry pan, on the stove and we
made boiled steak… That started me on a road to learn how to cook. I would ask
our old neighbors, or I would call grandma, but sooner or later, I figured it
out. I still love to cook to this day. I
even got to help cook for a few hundred people just before I got out of the
army…
My specialty these days is
breakfast. I can whip up some mean pancakes, Bert Dewey style. He was an old
friend of yours who cooked beer pancakes for us one time. He was also what most
people called a “dirty old man” but he seemed honest and hard working. He was
mostly covered in grease from working in his garage. I learned at a young age,
watching you two, that greasy hands could be washed off. I also learned that
cars could be tuned up and brakes could be replaced. I watched you from the time I could stand on
a milk crate and get my nose over the side of the fender on the car. I’ve
changed many spark plugs and changed tons of brakes over the years, some mine
and some for others – always cheaper than a shop would charge.
You would go to do wiring at someone’s
house or a camp in the woods. You would drag me along and at the time, little
did I know, it would influence what I would go on to do for a living. Training in the army, then on to college. I’ve
worked many different jobs as an electrician and learned many different parts
of the trade. I always knew that you were just a phone call away if I got stuck
or just needed some advice – Thank You.
As life went on and I started a
family of my own, along came my first son… I was amazed, proud and scared. I can remember when he was less than a year
old and he was just barely starting to walk, I think I called you about every
other week to apologize for being such a pain in the ass as I grew up. We would
talk about life and how things were when you were young as I came along in your
life. I would ask you for advice and was always amazed that you seemed to have
the right answer. I remember talking one
weekend and you said to me, “what makes you think I knew what I was doing?” That opened my eyes to a concept that I couldn’t
even imagine – my dad didn’t know what he was doing? No way. Dad’s know
everything… or so as a son to you, that
was my belief. You told me to do the best I could at the time, with the
knowledge that I had at hand. I have lived by that ever since. If tomorrow I
learned something new or different, then I could possibly change what I did
yesterday. But, yesterday, I made the best decision I could, because of you. My
oldest son will be twenty-two this year, and I have passed that wisdom on to
him, I hope. As my younger son comes
along, thirteen in a few days, I hope to be able to teach him from your
experience as well. I’m proud that you
gave me that, and I am proud that I can bring that to my sons from you.
Life has gone on pretty well
for me. There have been ups and downs in it, but I just keep going on. Some people have had better lives, some people
have had worse lives. I do not regret one minute of the life we have lived, the
experiences we have had or the things we have come through. It has formed me
into the person that I have become, each and every day. Thank you for that dad. If you have ever wondered if you did the
right thing – you did. If you have ever wondered If your son is proud of you –
indeed I am. Very very proud!
So, as you grow older, who
knows what is coming next… I should hope that your dad, my grandfather Mason,
is watching and waiting for both of us! Stories to be told again from Grace,
your mom, my grandmother. In a place
where sore backs won’t bother us, the sun is always out and we are free to come
and go as we wish. But while you are
still here, I just wanted to write, say thank you for the life you have given
me, and that I love you dad!!
See you soon,
Jim
